What is Missing When Your Self-Esteem is Low?
When you think about how low self-esteem affects your life, it is essential to know all the ways that this negative self-evaluation is blocking your happiness. Here are just some of the many things that will be missing from your life when your self-esteem is chronically low.
Low self-esteem can block you from having successful, healthy relationships. When you don’t feel happy with yourself and cannot love who you are, it can be hard to believe others would be able to love you, either.
When you have low self-esteem, it can often cause you to try to hide parts of yourself from others, particularly those parts that cause you to feel shame or make you feel vulnerable. You start to distance yourself from others, so they can’t ever get to know you the person know you.
When you hide your true self in this way, your interpersonal relationships suffer. Plus, when you are always hiding parts of yourself, and you realize people don’t know the real you, it can cause you to feel even worse about yourself. There is no one there to share your life. When you have low self-esteem, you believe you are unworthy of love or happiness, which prevents you from trying to have a healthy or long relationship with anyone.
When you don’t love yourself, you can become insecure, too, which may lead to neediness and possessiveness that can turn off potential partners, as well. When you have low self-esteem, you may often find yourself comparing your life to others and seeking out goals that are not necessarily what is important to you. Low self-esteem can cause you to question your choices and intentions in life, as well as believe you are unworthy of real success.
When you don’t feel confident in your abilities, you are more likely to give up trying in the face of adversity, to set goals much too low for yourself, and to be less likely to take risks that could lead to greater rewards. Your self-esteem contributes in significant ways to how confident you feel in all areas of your life.
Your relationship with yourself is crucial to your emotional well-being. Low self-esteem often leads to constant negative self-talk, which can prevent you from being emotionally balanced and stable. Your low self-worth will influence your contentment with your life, your self-confidence that can prevent you from seeking help when you need it, and your ability to overcome mental illness, such as depression or anxiety. These are real issues, and if you find yourself in this situation, please take the time to seek professional assistance. I sincerely believe no one should carry such a heavy burden on their own.
Low self-esteem leads you to question your worth and value as well as your abilities, which all erode your self-confidence. Low self-esteem leads you to doubt yourself throughout life, which means you are not encouraging yourself to succeed. Your self-esteem is the foundation for your inner confidence, and without it, you can find yourself floundering.
Low self-esteem erodes your motivation to seek out a real purpose and self-worthiness, which forces you to question your existence. And this negative self-judgment influences how you perceive others and the world, contributing to your adverse emotional health.
6-Steps To Build Self-Compassion
When the voice that’s inside your head starts to become your most prominent critic and worst advocate, it may be time for you to learn a little self-compassion. Learning to care about yourself and be compassionate toward your feelings and needs is a sign that you value yourself and want to nurture your happiness.
Consider what it would be like stranded on a deserted island with one other person. Would it be relevant to you that you and that person cared for and supported one another along with your trials and journey? Would it be worth the effort to learn how to get along with each other and create a positive relationship? Well, that inner voice is your partner on the island of life, so it’s time you started making friends with one another!
What is Self-Esteem Built On
1. Be Kind to Your Inner Child
No matter your age, you can still feel hurt, disappointment, and shame. When you recognize these emotions in a child, you understand they need kindness and compassion. So why, when you see those same feelings in yourself, do you deny yourself the same consideration? Treat yourself as you would any small child in need of caring and support, especially when things are hard.
2. Write Yourself a Permission Slip
The basis of self-compassion is allowing yourself to be flawed and imperfect, just like every other human on the planet. While you may not be perfect, no one expects you to be, so why do you expect it of yourself? Write yourself a mental permission slip, and the next time you make a mistake, cash it in without regret. Recognize that it’s ok to screw up. What is important is that you continue to learn and grow from your experience.
Punishing yourself for your mistakes and flaws is a sure sign you lack self-compassion. When you discipline your future for mistakes you made in the past, you are only setting yourself up for more disappointment and heartache. Start by forgiving and moving on from all your past transgressions. If it helps, write a letter to yourself, expressing your forgiveness, it will help you move on and let go.
4. Be mindful.
Listen and pay attention to that inner voice, that harsh self-critic that is always offering his or her opinion. Become mindful of when that voice chimes in and the words it uses.
Becoming aware of that inner critic is necessary if you want to silence it once and for all. The next time you hear it, fight back. Argue instead of why you are worthy or capable. Demand to know where that voice gets the right to be so cruel and heartless toward you. Take command and feed it positive affirmations to silence it.
5. Embrace Challenges
Every obstacle and setback in your life is a chance to learn more and become better. Adopting a growth mindset, one that views failures and challenges as learning experiences rather than mistakes to regret. Develop a more compassionate attitude toward yourself. Find inspiration in your mistakes, which are helping you to grow stronger each day.
6. Be Grateful
Instead of focusing on the negative, try embracing gratitude. Acknowledge your strengths. Pay attention to the many gifts and blessings of your life. Focus on what is going well, and you will start to feel more loving toward yourself for the bountiful life you have.
It is difficult to underestimate the importance that self-esteem plays in your overall happiness and well-being. Many aspects of life will be difficult to achieve when your self-esteem is low, so protecting it and bolstering it should be a constant priority. If you want to unblock your life and start living how you want, working on your self-esteem is an excellent first step.
Learning to comfort yourself, nurture, and care for your body and mind, and express your appreciation toward yourself are all beneficial for building your self-compassion, as well. Learning to love yourself will have an immense impact on your relationships with others, but more importantly, it will allow you to have a healthy, loving relationship with yourself.